Perspective

The phone call immediately put me in a sour mood.

My OB office called this morning.  Two weeks ago, my doctor had seen what she deemed enough progress for us to go ahead and schedule an induction on August 11th.  Two days from today.  Last week, since my doctor was on vacation, I saw a nurse practicioner.  She seemed to think a bit differently from my doctor.  Now my doctor would like to see me again tomorrow for an exam to determine whether or not it's a good idea to go ahead with the induction on Thursday.

What?  My spirit dampened a bit.  We had our hearts set on Thursday, August 11th.  Although I've found myself going back and forth, doubting that decision a bit, I was still sooo anticipating that day as the day we'd finally get to meet this new life.

I said goodbye to my husband as he left for work... with a smile and a kiss he tried to encourage me.  I still found myself a tad bitter and resentful about it all.  I tried to proceed with my morning and encourage myself to keep looking forward.

I quickly put a pot of boiling water on the stove for coffee, grabbed a basketful of laundry, turned on some encouraging praise and worship music, sat at the kitchen table to fold clothes and chat with our four-year old as she colored.  It only took about 30 seconds.

Perspective was gained.

It had been one year ago, almost to the day.  We had learned, to our ever hopeful hearts, that after losing one child in March, we again, were facing a failed pregnancy and losing another baby.  This time, we soon discovered, a baby girl.  Emerson Jayne.

Cherish THIS moment.

The words were a whisper with the passing winds outside on this beautiful, cooler summer morning.

I felt the tears come quickly to my eyes.  With the kicks of this, perhaps not-yet-ready to arrive babe :) and the sweet voice of our beautiful growing Maddie explaining with pride about her colorful, rainbow horse she'd just colored, I was reminded to be thankful for now.

This moment.  This time with her of peace as I waited for the water to boil, accomplishing a simple, yet necessary task of folding our laundry, thankful in that moment for my iPhone with a wide array of music to fit many occasions.

Perspective gained... I'm thankful.  So ever thankful.  For what was.... what is to come.... and especially for right now.